


Cats Rule, Dogs Drool

by Lopithecus



Series: RK1K Week 2019 [1]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Connor is bad at flirting, Day 1 Prompt, I may or may not continue this, M/M, Markus doesn't realize Connor is flirting, Markus owns a cat named Jericho, Pre-Slash, YouTube, don't ask why, rk1k week 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-09
Updated: 2019-01-09
Packaged: 2019-10-07 02:03:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17356865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lopithecus/pseuds/Lopithecus
Summary: Markus runs a cat channel on YouTube. One day, he watches a YouTube video that his subscribers linked to. Little did he know, it was by somecuteannoying jerk.





	Cats Rule, Dogs Drool

**Author's Note:**

> For Rk1k week! It’s only day two and I’m already behind. What a great start!!
> 
> Prompt: Day 1 - YouTube

Markus sits at his desk with his cat purring on his lap, getting ready to start up his camera. Today, he’s going to be reviewing a video that some of his subscribers on YouTube have been begging him to watch. Apparently, some of his own YouTube videos have been mentioned in said video. It’s peaked Markus’ curiosity.

He clicks on one of the links a commenter gave him and immediately the video pops up and starts playing. Markus quickly pauses the video but reads the title; _~~Cats Rule, Dogs Drool~~ _ _(Dogs Love and Stay, Cats Shove Away)_. He’s instantly offended, being a cat lover and all, and scowls at the title. What does that even mean? Did the person who made this video just desperately come up with some kind of opposite saying to the age old cats rule, dogs drool? It doesn’t even sound good.

Rolling his eyes, Markus steels himself and starts up his camera, smiling. “Hello Jericrew! Welcome back to another video.” Markus holds up his cat. “Say hi Jericho.” He makes his cat wave with his paws and the cat makes a deep growling noise in his throat. Markus places the cat gently back on his lap.

He clears his throat, making a mental note to edit it out later. “Today, I’m going to be watching,” he pauses, takes an exasperated breath as he looks at the title of the video, then shifts his eyes back to his camera, “this video that you all have been pleading for me to watch. I got to say, I’m a little skeptical of the title but for all of you,” he beams one of his winning smiles, “I’ll do it.”

He clicks play on the video and a handsome man and his dog walks into frame. “Hello everyone!” The dog barks. “That’s right Sumo, today we are going to be talking about cats.” Markus clenches his jaw and then remembers he’s filming himself. Pausing the video, he takes a deep breath, licks his lips, and then continues watching. “This video for example.”

One of Markus’ videos pop up in the right hand corner of the video he is watching. It’s his latest one, the one he made about how to properly feed your cat and what foods to buy your beloved feline on a limited budget. He can’t imagine what this man might have to say about it but as he listens to it, he’s surprised to realize that there is actually quite a bit he can talk about.

So far, it hasn’t been too negative. Markus will give — Markus scrolls down to the username — Connor credit for still being concerned about feeding any animal healthy foods, but when another one of his videos is shown, the one he made about how to properly play with your cat, he finds out just how much Connor doesn’t like balls of teeth and claws. Markus is gaping at his computer screen, trying to comprehend what this man is saying to his audience — all of 100,000 subscribers (Markus is proud to say he has 100,010 subscribers) — and quickly shuts his mouth when he feels drool run down his chin. This man is unbelievable.

“How can you find any fun by playing with an animal like this?” The man — Connor, Markus corrects himself — says to the camera. “And this video.” Markus’ _Cats Do Love Their Humans_ video comes up. “I don’t understand how this is proof that your cat loves you. With a dog,” Sumo barks again, “you see their tail wagging, they come up to you all excited, and you can play fetch with them. Dogs keep you company while cats show their affection by running away and hiding.”

Markus has to pause the video again. His hands are shaking with anger and doesn’t notice that Jericho has jumped off his lap at some point during his watch. With another deep breath, he gets up to go find him. In the end, Markus spots Jericho under the couch. With a grumble, he kneels down and coaches the cat out. “Please don’t prove this jerk right,” Markus mumbles. Jericho meows as Markus picks him up off the floor, carrying the agitated cat back to his desk and setting him down on his lap.

Markus looks at his camera to see how long he’s been recording for and to ground himself back into video making mode, then continues to play the video. “Now,” Connor continues. “Maybe I’ve got cats all wrong. I’m sure I’ll get a lot of comments on how great cats are but,” Connor shrugs, “this _is_ a dog channel which you have to admit, is more interesting than a _cat_ channel where the cat lays around all day.”

Markus is almost ready to turn the video off when suddenly Connor smirks. “But I’m willing to be proven wrong.” The man’s smirk grows, almost turning flirty. “So, tell me _Deviant Leader_ ,” Markus’ cheeks turn a hint of red with Connor saying his YouTube username, “or should I say, _Markus_ ,” Markus’ cheeks turn even darker and he glances at the camera, praying it doesn’t pick it up, “can you prove me wrong?” All of a sudden, the cheerful smile is back on Connor’s face as if that sultry grin was never there, aimed at Markus and Markus alone. Markus swallows thickly, shifting in his seat. “So until next time my wonderful Machines! This is Connor, sent by Dog Lover.”

The video ends there and Markus is left speechless for a few seconds until his brain decides to come back from the clouds and Connor’s last words to him finally register. A smile starts to grow on his face and Markus’ hand swipes down Jericho’s back, the cat purring loudly once more. His gaze lines up with the lense of the camera and he turns his grin into a confident smirk.

“Game on.”

**Author's Note:**

> Cats are actually my favorite animal and I really needed a fic in which Markus owns a cat so… here we are. XP
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed and thank you for reading!!


End file.
